Immaturity. Laziness. Maybe these two are the primary reasons it is difficult to make significant progress not only spiritually but also as a human being. Many of us tend to be drifters. We go where the current takes us. And just like a driftwood that has found a shore, we stay on that beach where we are comfortable.
We seek to grow as a person — as a form of life. Yet, we think that there is some kind of Holy Grail or fountain of knowledge (perhaps even magic), on the outside, waiting to be discovered — or delivered by fate like a stork dropping a newborn babe in our lap.
It seems to me that what we want is a remedy that we can digest, orally or intellectually, and overnight we will achieve a significant miracle — a change that spells we are a new person.
So, we look for whatever kind of preoccupation that we expect, in the end, will fill in that pit-less hole in our lives. Careers. Relationships. Pleasures. Adventures. Conquests. To prove something. That we are special. And because we are special, we deserve some reward like happiness or peace or contentment.
We are special. Each one of us. That is why we are here. Breathing. What greater validation do we need in order to satisfy that hunger for recognition?
It seems to me that, for most of us, focusing on knowing our own self deeper – beyond the superficial cover that conforms to societal ethics, customs and traditions – is a futile exercise. Yet, we are quite willing to go through all hoops and loops, even whorls and whirls, in order to discover another soul. Why, may I ask? Does our own self deserve less than another human being? Don’t we want to know what lies beyond our own emotions, physical and intellect?
Escapism. We are all guilty of that. We have probably the shortest span of attention. We easily get bored. With ourselves. With everyone and everything. So, we tend to escape from the reality at hand — and we let the ceaseless chatter of our mind take the lead and sends us drifting anywhere and everywhere except here and now.
When we do take the time to look at the here and now, all we do is to bitch about what is wrong with it.
But, what if – – –
We learn to be alone and enjoy our own company?
We learn to contemplate in silence and study our own self? Our thoughts and our reaction to our thoughts?
We learn to imagine what it is really like to be in someone else’s shoes? Both the negative and positive aspects of that “someone else’s shoes“ taken into consideration, of course. Do we like to be Jack Ma managing the empire of Alibaba; being held responsible to produce profit not only of his own money but also the money of the people who invested in his empire – without mentioning that he is also responsible to provide the livelihood of thousands and thousands of people who work under him? Before we envy his money, try and imagine, first, if we are willing to take the responsibility that comes with his success.
We learn to appreciate the simplicity of our own life — the people in our life who bring us joy, love, care and company — the fact that we get to survive our ups and downs and still come out alive.
We learn to tend to our own garden and water what is already in it; rather than continuously seek an addition or replacement to make it more beautiful. Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder, isn’t it so? And that one man’s garbage may be another man’s treasure, isn’t it quite true also? What if what we think and see as rough stone actually hides a diamond inside but we throw it away?
Truth is, we are simply childish (worse, infantile) and lazy towards life. It is plain to see we do not want to accept responsibility for our own life — nor are we happy to change and rewire our own mindset in order to change our very life.
Hence, we blame our relationships — we blame our jobs — we blame our governments — and we blame God or the devil. When, in fact, all we want to do is to anchor our hopes, our dreams, and our happiness to another. So, we believe in fairy tales like Santa Claus, Superman, Wonder Woman, Mister or Miss Right, soulmates and gods to save us from hell and misery.
What if God is trapped within us imprisoned by the very trappings we set on our own — locked from the inside because we forget we hold the key in our own hand?
How many lifetimes we want to go through before we realize that it is our own laziness and immaturity that prevent us from soaring high?
Do not look to me for answers. I am lazy. I am immature. I am a drifter. Someone who understands these mumbo-jumbo intellectually but too lazy to move my ass and use my intelligence to really cut through the bullshit and see life for what it is.
Truth is a pathless land. We can only try and find it by trailblazing on our own in order to get out of the maze. No savior. What is certain is that there is life that sustains all these — a life larger and greater than the one we call “me.”
Light, love and one thousand and one hugs from my heart to yours.